As you may have gathered, I'm getting a tad bit ahead of myself so I'll leave the nerdy stuff until a little later on.
So a little explanation as to how I came across this book and read it and such. Ordinarily, I steer clear of the Young Adult section thanks to the vast volume of paranormal romances that are still churned out in ridiculous numbers in an effort to rake in cash. Teen and young adult romances, even if only subplots, usually exasperate me beyond measure so I much prefer to look for something with a bit more substance. Speculative fiction, sci-fi, fantasy, that kind of thing. Stuff where someone has thought outside the box or focused on something in society to critique. I just can't resist it.
I didn't happen across this book during an idle perusal of shelves in a bookstore but rather I went looking for it for college. Trying to be ahead of my reading for college, I went looking for my books a little early with the intention of reading as many of them as possible prior to starting back so that I'd have time to do research in the library (ha because that's a realistic goal). So "Only Ever Yours" was on the list and the cover just kept creeping me out.
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| The cover that still freaks me out |
I don't like dolls, okay? I can't pinpoint exactly what it is about them that freaks me out but they freak me out. So of course out of all the books I'd gotten, this cover kept jumping out of me. Once I was looking at it, I found myself reading the words on the front, then I found myself reading the back and some sort of creepy fascination had me opening it up to read. I don't need to have read this for months but I started reading it and the more I read the more hooked--and horrified--by it I became.
Without spoiling things for people who haven't read it (you should read it), this novel delves into the future where women are no longer born naturally but have to be created. The Eves are created for men and spend their lives preparing for their roles as mothers, prostitutes and, for the rare few, a life of chastity in the School. Companions, Concubines and Chastities, as they're officially termed, are trained from the age of 4 up until the time they are assigned their place at the age of 17.
Sound bad? Well, on the surface it may sound horrible but the reality of such a society painted by the book is much worse.
The novel is set in the School during the final year of one group of Eves and is told from the point of view of freida (all Eves have lowercase names, presumably because they're lesser than men). Her life revolves around appearing perfect, maintaining the ideal weight at all costs (bulimia and anorexia being acceptable options) and picking at the flaws of the other girls around her. One of the common slogans in the book is something along the lines of although the Eves are made to be perfect, there is always room for improvement. Sound in any way familiar?
In our society, women--teenage girls in particular--are constantly picked on by the media. They aren't skinny enough, they aren't pretty enough, they're too skinny, they're too pretty and many more impossible ideals that contradict each other. Women are so often defined by their bodies and their is a massive emphasis on how women should look for men. I don't know how many articles you see around the place that talk about what men want in a woman, how to be the ideal woman for your man, etc. Women are defined by men: how they see them, what they expect of them, what they think of them and so on and so forth. "Only Ever Yours" touches on so many of these things and forces you to draw parallels with the world we live in and it's quite frankly terrifying--and it should be.
Just this month, Louise O'Neill has released another novel that deals with another prominent issue in society: rape. As I understand it, "Asking For It" deals with the aftermath of the rape of a girl at a party and how she deals with it and how others perceive her. Now, I haven't read it yet but I believe it is meant to be a powerful novel to do with rape culture, victim blaming and consent. As the title suggests, the victim is considered to be the one at fault rather than the man because she sent out the wrong signals and "invited" the attack.
Unfortunately, as stupid as that idea seems to me, it is the way that society looks at it. Men are not to blame, or not all men are like that. Women are sexualised by men in film, television, magazines and every other medium in between and so it's almost expected that women are around purely for men's benefit. See the connection with the book? Eves are made for men and men think women are here for their benefit. You might deny that that's the view of our society but the evidence is too obvious to deny when it's thrown so blatantly in your face.
While body image is a main focus in "Only Ever Yours", you still get an idea of rape culture. It is pointed out in the novel a few times that the Eves cannot say "no" to a man. A particularly horrifying scene for me is when one of the men come to examine and sample (yes, sample) the girls, attempts to rape freida. He just expects her to have sex with him because he has asked for her and that's what she's there for. Particularly sickening and frighteningly accurate is that when she says no, he tells her that "no can mean yes".
I don't know how often I've heard testimony by rapists that said that their victims didn't mean it when they said no. It's real people. Too real.
There are bound to be people who would read this and think that I'm making this up or that I hate men (I'm transmasculine so self-hatred?) but it is true. Only recently, a girl I know said that she was at a party and that some guy kept hitting on her. She rebuffed him again and again, made it abundantly clear that she didn't want anything to do with her and eventually he gave up. Except that when she was leaving, he asked to talk to her for a moment and once she stepped to one side to speak to him, he started aggressively kissing her. Then when she shoved him away, he was confused and offended.
I may be off on a wee bit of a ramble right now so I'll finish this up before I go off on another one. "Only Ever Yours" is a book that I think everyone should read. You might complain that the characters aren't likable, or that much of the novel is superficial but for the former, that's no excuse considering what the story is driving at and for the latter, it's about superficiality! Hell, it's so superficial, being intelligent or having a nice personality are seen as insults. Read it through and then judge it if that's what you want to do. I'd also recommend reading "Asking For It". Even though I haven't read it, it's a subject that should be read because it's an issue that has to be faced. Maybe I'll write about it when I get around to reading it.
Anyway, that's all from me for the moment. I'll try to come back with more of my ramblings a bit sooner next time.
Max
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